Written By: Kyra Bodnar | May 26th, 2016
Mom is tired. She's maybe in her late forties. Maybe she's already gone through a hip surgery or two, had menopause, and is chasing around your grandchildren, which is fueled by giggling. Even though you and your siblings are grown up and do mostly everything independently, believe it or not, mom does more for you (than you think) behind the scenes. She accepts your requests for help, even when she's exhausted. She takes pride in being a good grandmother, and offers to grab the baby for a play date several times a week. Maybe she brings you your favorite baked spaghetti dish, prays for you every night, or thinks of you in everything she does. We don't think a lot is going on with mom, but there is. Even though our life in our 20's is vivid and non-stop, hers has her own way of being challenging, too. Don't take advantage of mom just because you think she's getting old and bored.
Mom and daughter relationships change like seasons with age. Mom's have a way of protecting their daughters that might not show the same as hers and your brother's relationship does. There's more than likely going to be times when you see a side of your mother that you're not used to seeing - her heartbreak shows more, she tries less with her appearance, or she doesn't hold back when she's honestly angry with you. This is natural. We're grown up, we can handle some raw feelings. That's life. With being an adult, things don't get sheltered from you. Life is loud, ugly, and doesn't shy away now that you're older. We must face these feelings and realizations with strength and courage. Be there for mom when she's in tears at your feet for a day that just went horribly wrong. Be there when she's venting about a failed marriage, relationship, or friendship. Often times, you're the only one she can really vent to at this point. Good friendships are far and few the older that you get.
Mom doesn't love you any less. She just loves you differently. She no longer can protect your young and fragile heart. She no longer needs to be a parent if she doesn't feel like it. Sometimes, you'll be a mother to her. There will be days when she needs to come over and curl up next to you in your bed. There will be days when she annoys you, pokes you for fun, and is just goofy around you. There will be days when you make an idiotic choice and she just can't help but roll her eyes at you and slam doors. You don't need to be a baby anymore - a mother is a lifelong best friend given to you by the Universe. Don't take her for granted. Love her. Be tireless with her. Hold her. Take her for walks and meals. Steal her clothes, let her steal yours. Offer help. Don't overwhelm her. Don't use her. Love her. Love her. Love her.
